Bi Weekly, maybe

My goal was to write everyday. Now, I'm at every week, or maybe every two weeks. Life just has a way of being so busy.
I was doing a mental recap of my day earlier and this is the way I found it --
Go to work - work all day without a lunch break because it is still so f*ing busy - I am beyond burnt out but I won't bitchy blog about that because I'm way past that. I need to make the change and it is almost in my grasp - so, less complaining and more action.
On my way home, I was debating on how to spend my couple of hours before I pick up my kids - I need to buy pajamas for this pajama drive we are doing at work - well, let me rephrase- that I am coordinating and orchestrating. I needed to go shopping over the weekend, but I ended up using my time very irresponsibly, to the tune of staying out all night both nights and wasting the next day trying to catch up on sleep - it just never works as well as night time sleep. I think it's because it's so riddled with guilt- I should have slept last night, not try to sleep instead of going to a baby shower. Snap.
I'm also caught up in the angst (or created angst) of meeting someone new and trying to figure out what, if anything, is going on. I think me being so insistent on never giving out my number puts me in another confusing situation because when it comes down to it, I don't want to be the one to call. But I also don't want to be harrassed, which has happened before. It happened just enough to make me not really want to give out my info.
The most productive thing I did over the weekend was go cross country skiing on Saturday with a friend. At least I got outside for some fresh air and exercise. Score one.
So, the debate tonight was - go shopping (you should see the state of my shoes and boots - not to mention the tired sweaters and shirts I've been wearing - my wardrobe is burnt out too) for the pajamas (why do I get myself into these time consuming commitments- oh yeah, because it's for a good cause) -- there's also the Monday night Yoga class I've been missing and wanted to go to. And, I need groceries for my kids lunches for the week, not to mention mine. It's starting to sound like I have ADD.
I got home and I was starving because I'd missed lunch at work. So, I quickly wolfed down some food. Then I landed on my decision - run around the lake. That was really rewarding. But it put me at 7 p.m. What would I do with my last hour? I remembered I was out of gas. So, that was my start. Is my brain completely fried? When I got to the gas station, I popped the trunk rather than opening the gas door. Maybe it was low blood sugar.
Getting groceries was the next best use of my remaining minutes. I did my shopping, got to the check out and realized I had left my check card in the car from when I pumped gas. I then had to run out to the car to track it down.
That left me 8 minutes to run to the liquor store (I am also out of wine) and then go get the kids.
The point of this entire tirade is to remind myself that "partying" - oh I do hate that word- all weekend and not getting any of life's necessities taken care of is a very foolish decision. I'm judging myself on this one and hoping I'll remember next time to take care of first things first -- one of them being sleep and proper nutrition. I do feel the need at this point to clarify that my kids were with their father all weekend, thus the very childlike behavior on my part.
I promise the next post will be about the whole meeting someone and how it all went down in this particular case. By then I will probably know more anyway - both about how I feel and if it was just a mistake. I guess what I mean by that is once all the smoke clears and the beer / wine/ margaritas wear(s) off, what is there and what was there? I usually know right away but this time I don't. Sometimes you just don't know. Time makes it more clear, and that is a lesson.